I ran my first 5K in 39:51 min. It was a personal goal to run under 40 minutes, so I’m very happy. Whoo!


This is the end

When I got engaged, I thought, “Oh! How wonderful! I’ll be married AND I’ll have a lot to post about along the way!” Well, I didn’t think that right away, but you get my drift.

Turns out, that hasn’t been the case. I’ve been so busy with, well, life, that I haven’t been able to keep this blog up-to-date. I’m really sorry about that, those of you who still read here. I used to use this blog as a way of keeping up with people. What is my friend who works less than a mile from me thinking about today? Let’s not ask her, let’s just read her blog. I thought I was doing great with that set-up, being all in-the-know and whatnot. Then I realized that it was actually more fun to see my friends in the flesh. And isn’t that how you’re supposed to keep up with your friends?

And THEN I remembered that when I would try to post things that were utterly honest, I would fret over what others thought or said. The anxiety I felt over the post last March concerning my lack of religious faith affected me more than I’ve let on to most people. Why should I have felt that way? It’s my blog, my belief, my right to say what I want. But for some reason, the fact that others thought I had come to the decision lightly or hadn’t made the right choice didn’t roll of my back as easily as I would have liked. (I’ve come to more of a definite conclusion than I had then, but I still think I’m better off not posting about it anymore.)

It was at that exact moment that I started to think that maybe having a blog wasn’t for me. I don’t like arguments or confrontation. I worry about debating issues, because I lose my words in emotions. It doesn’t mean I don’t have a good reason for feeling the way I do, it just means I clam up when I try to express those reasons. From what I can see, successful bloggers don’t have this problem. Or they steer clear of hot button issues because they actually have a way of turning mundane life occurrences into great stories. I don’t really have that talent either.

Yesterday, I followed a link to Why I shut down my blog. And after I read it, I seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. Because she put into words what I’ve been thinking about for almost a year. This blog has become a chore for me. Even now, as I’m writing, I’m putting off work. If I would have written this post last night, I would have been putting off dinner or sleeping. There isn’t a time anymore when I think that I’d really like to post something. Sure, there are random jokes or funny pictures, but honestly, I can just pass those along in an attempt to clog up my friends’ email accounts.

I guess the whole point of this post is to say that while I’m not giving up on blogging entirely, I’m saying goodbye for now. I’m busy, I’m tired, and I just don’t have the motivation for this anymore. I think my time would be better spent doing other things.

This, of course, doesn’t mean I won’t still be reading blogs. Oh, I will. Google Reader and I have a date every day. Several dates if I’m lucky. And I’ll try to keep this blog around just in case I get the inkling to post something. Keep me on your reader, if you’ve got one.

I’ve had fun doing this, and I hope you’ve had fun reading.